Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Mocking the Serious

A couple of weeks ago, my neighbor was telling me that Ghanaians often joke about things that happen during the somber pre-burial rites typical of funerals, a ceremony that marks the time when the people closest to the deceased say their final goodbyes.  He told me about a boy's funeral he had gone to some time back.  When it was the father's turn to speak, the man couldn't contain his grief so he stuffed his already saturated handkerchief into his mouth to stifle his sobs.  An appropriate time later, when the father and a group of his friends were relaxing together, one of the friends teased him about the handkerchief and everybody laughed about it. 

More recently, my boss was very upset about a mistake that had been made in my department, and while he was reprimanding us he kept repeating the words "shame on you."  When he stepped out, it took only a couple of minutes for one of my coworkers to start parodying the mantra.  A day or two later, a couple of my coworkers even teased the boss about it and shamed him back in front of the rest of the department.  I was surprised to see that he took it in good humor. 

These kinds of one liners and offhand insults do not summon the full seriousness of the original event.  Instead, by making humor out of a painful or uncomfortable moment, people put distance between that moment and the present.  As best I can tell, the mockery signals that the group has moved on or is at least capable of doing so.

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